Wow! This post was written a long time ago. Still holds true today! Thanks for all the likes and reblogs, people! Keep on keeping on.

TJM

thejoemoran:

Just read somewhere, doesn’t matter where - it’s happening, that, THE Billy Vera is performing at Vitello’s this Friday night in Studio City. I called Vitello’s and they have assured me this is not an April Fool’s Day joke. 

BILLY VERA IS AWESOME. I repeat, BILLY VERA IS AWESOME.

Why do I like this song? It’s all about Alex P. Keaton, (APK), falling in love with Ellen Reed from the 1980’s hit TV show, Family Ties. This was a two-part episode. As a young aspiring APK, I watched their relationship blossom during prime time on Sunday nights. I looked forward to finding my very own Ellen some day. (Still searching, too) 

Let’s face it, growing up I wanted to be Alex P. Keaton. Who didn’t? APK was smart, quick with the wit, and wore sweater vests & blazers with patches on the elbows. Alex was a professor in the making. Most of all, he was dating Ellen. (Come to think of it, Ellen might have been my first of many TV crushes)

Anywho… Here’s the cool part: even though Alex and Ellen broke up on the show, they’re married in real life.  What do you think about that, Lauren Miller from seasons 6 and 7?

Hope you enjoy the song.

My vehicle surpassed the 100K mile mark today. She’s been good to me, but not ‘Phil Collins’ good.

My vehicle surpassed the 100K mile mark today. She’s been good to me, but not ‘Phil Collins’ good.

#BozoTHEClown: Former host of the #BozoShow. Now wanted for violating the #RICO Act. Bozo has been known to associate with other circus clowns such as #CookieTheClown, and #WhizzoTheClown. It is believed that Cookie is hiding Bozo in his car somewhere in between 15 other clowns. (Cookie drives a ‘67 Clown Car. It’s incredibly small) Bozo has long been accused of throwing the first pie in the Great Pie Fight of #1984, and is considered extremely lovable, happy, and goofy. Always remember to smile, and maybe chuckle a little if contact is made. Bozo is armed with multiple bottles of seltzer water. His trigger finger is itchy. He will spray you on site. This is not the Hunger Games, people. This shit is for real. Be warned.

#BozoTHEClown: Former host of the #BozoShow. Now wanted for violating the #RICO Act. Bozo has been known to associate with other circus clowns such as #CookieTheClown, and #WhizzoTheClown. It is believed that Cookie is hiding Bozo in his car somewhere in between 15 other clowns. (Cookie drives a ‘67 Clown Car. It’s incredibly small) Bozo has long been accused of throwing the first pie in the Great Pie Fight of #1984, and is considered extremely lovable, happy, and goofy. Always remember to smile, and maybe chuckle a little if contact is made. Bozo is armed with multiple bottles of seltzer water. His trigger finger is itchy. He will spray you on site. This is not the Hunger Games, people. This shit is for real. Be warned.

nbcsnl:


Happy birthday, America! Now GET OFF THE SHED and join us for some good ole fashioned American BBQ:
 Frank Henderson (Will Ferrell) frightens neighbors with his constant verbal abuse and chilling threats toward his children 
Bedilia (Nasim Pedrad) might just be hanging out with her dad (Alec Baldwin) a bit too much at her birthday BBQ
BBQ expert Rusty “Fireball” Wilson (John Goodman) outlines a few tips for Margaret Jo McCullen (Ana Gasteyer) and Teri Rialto (Molly Shannon) 
And don’t forget to catch Swine Fever* down at Carter ‘N Sons BBQ! 
*The management of Carter ‘N Sons would like to clarify that “Swine Fever” is not related to the H1N1 virus, or “Swine Flu”… “Swine Fever” is a metaphor meant to symbolize a craving for Carter ‘N Sons Barbecue. It was crafted for an ad campaign several years ago, well before the “Swine Flu” or H1N1 epidemic… 

nbcsnl:

Happy birthday, America! Now GET OFF THE SHED and join us for some good ole fashioned American BBQ:

*The management of Carter ‘N Sons would like to clarify that “Swine Fever” is not related to the H1N1 virus, or “Swine Flu”… “Swine Fever” is a metaphor meant to symbolize a craving for Carter ‘N Sons Barbecue. It was crafted for an ad campaign several years ago, well before the “Swine Flu” or H1N1 epidemic… 

We Have A Rat In Our Ranks (or maybe it’s just a big mouse)!

Friday nights can be exciting at the THE Joe Moran Studios in Long Beach, CA. The call center was receiving an unusually high amount of inbounds. The phones were ringing off the hook, not to mention the writer’s room was a party atmosphere. All sorts of people wanted updates on current projects, to vent and scream at me, laugh with me, and to mostly hear the sweet and sexy sound of my voice. (Lately I’ve been applying a deeper baritone delivery. I’m going for a Barry White vibe. But I digress.) At one point the calls ceased and I had some down time.

I decided to to take the edge off a little. It was a long day and by the time I finished my last call I wanted to jump out of my skin. I noticed something out the corner of my eye while setting the mood with some incense cones, a little Chanting music, and a few chocolate chip cookies. I turned my head fast enough to see a pretty big, four legged varmint make a B line for the studio’s bathroom. He shut the door behind him, lit a candle and turned on the radio. What the hell? What was he doing in there? Was this guy gonna take a dump and read the paper? I’m kidding. We’re talking about a mouse, people. Although he did run into the bathroom. 

The bathroom is small, and this guy only had one place to go  - the farthest corner from the door. He hid behind the plunger which is behind the toilet. Such an obvious move. We had a stand-off. I was nervous and didn’t know what to do. My heart was racing. I stepped into the bathroom. Nothing. He was playing it cool. I shook the shower curtain a little. That startled the guy. He charged me. I was in bare feet, and panicked.  I started to hop on one foot before switching to the other. I was screaming, too. I was scared that this fat mouse might take me down. It all happened so fast. The mouse ran through my legs as I lost my balance jumping up and down from foot to foot. I bruised my forearm and strained my vocal chords a little. The mouse took me down.

Growing up I didn’t have to deal with this shit. I had cats. Not to mention this mother fucker is big. HUGE! I’d call it a rat due to his size but honestly, after reflecting on how long I’ve lived here, my rich tasting diet, coupled with the fact I’m a great but messy cook who doesn’t clean up well, I’ve come to the conclusion that we are dealing with a very obese mouse. This is a mouse who has no intention of leaving the studio, or rocking the boat as he is living the good life under this roof. I can’t blame him really. This place is like a castle and there is always a great tasting morsel or two dropped from the heavens on a daily basis. If I don’t catch this mouse first he’ll probably get diabetes or eventually die from heart disease. Just saying…

Anonymous asked: why?

Why ask why? Drink Bud Dry.

Here is a picture of the Hollywood sign.

Here is a picture of the Hollywood sign.